Kev Pokes Smot

Snoogans!

How do you keep a retard in suspense?






































































































































































































.

Still not shut down.

I guess the first amendment must be on my side afterall. Oh yeah. Bwock On! Some would look at this little masterpiece of a blog and consider it a critique of Kev's retard ways. Others would consider it mean. Well, tough shit. What's good for the goose is ultimately good for the gander is it not? That doesn't make my brother Kev any less of a whiny little tard-bitch who can't take what he dishes out. truth be told. Right Kev? He's gonna call the cops today.

would you fucking grow up and get a life? Who ever you are you are a fucking child who has an unhealthy obsessive gay crush on me. So FUCK YOU. What you're doing is illegal and I'm gonna call the police today to investigate of who you are.

Best of luck to you brother. I really mean that. So if you want to throw me in for slander and defamation of character, that's fine. But it's best to be innocent of those charges yourself as well wouldn't it? So here's my dedication to you dumbass.

So bring it on tough guy.

Girl you know it's true.

Any Questions?

Mr. Fabulous

As Kev Brocks brother Bev, I am obliged to mention a few more things about the ambiguously gay man. I already mentioned he was retarded, but for those new subscribers to this blog, yes, he is even more gay than feng shui. Our mom doesn't want me to mention it because it's a big family secret. God knows, I don't even want to mention it, but as I said previously. My shrink considers this my therapy. Think about it in perspective. if you were in my shoes, you would need therapy too. I read Kev's latest entry, and now it appears his gayness has gone to the extent of fantasizing about men in uniform. I often wonder what's next. Cowboys? Indians? Construction Workers? Sailors? I'm thinking there's a song there. I'm not musical enough to write it, but then again, neither is Kev. I feel sorry for Kev. I really do, because at times I wonder what he would do if presented with a big juicy pussy. I am not sure if he would even know what to do aside from the general tard-esque staring and drooling and mumbling in tardish. I was under the assumption that that language was a form of elvish. But I dare not utter it here. See, Kev seems to be under the impression that he is completly innocent when it comes to bashing people. Truth or not, bashing is still bashing. I guess it just depends on your mastery of the english language enough to use unlike a tard would. If he understands the writings in this blog, dare I say, I am floored with utter shivering stupefaction.

But Kev is still a tard. And this is my therapy. You can't knock a guy for trying to get therapy. Even his tardliness Sir Tardery McGay Ballswab Brockway IV should know that. That's what I am going to call him from now on. Sir Tardery McGay Ballswab Brockway IV has such a regal ring to it. Don't ya think?

I think so.

So this is my dedication to you Mr. Ballswab. You have earned it. Lift your goblet high your tardliness.

Cheers!

(Your Number 1 Fan and Brother)
Bev

Kev Has Anal Warts

I just heard from a friend of a friend that in fact Kev IS gay. She told me that she saw him out at the Wilton Mall leaving hickies on this biker guy in pleather pants named butch. Apparently, this is a well-kept family secret, and only a few people know. But myself, being the trafficer of information that I am, felt the need to tell the world that Kev Brock is undeniably flaming retarded gay.

I had my suspicions when he posted that he would willingly play at a gay bar, but I had no clue as to the depths of which his gayness stemmed. I had always thought as a kid growing with my brother Kev that he may have homesexual tendencies (especially after he fondled his cousin Adams dick a few times) but I never would have thought that he was into the whole stereotypical leather-clad butch type.

I have tried to tell mom about it many times, but she just sits there and coddles him saying, "not my boy. how could he be such a fucking faggot? I don't believe it. not my boy." but alas, tis true.

About a month ago. mom got really drunk and hit on Kev. I thought it was wrong because incest is bad, but appently, mom and dad are really brother and sister. I had no clue and that information floored me. I am now getting counceling on a regular basis because I blieve that both myself and my brother Kev have been inviarably scarred for life.

My brother seems to believe that he can work through his problems not though counceling, but through music. I have often told Kev that music is not the solution to his problems, rather, he should just go out and find a cheap hooker for the night. But Kev is stubbonly retarded and he has expressed confusion as to what his penis is actually for. For the longest time, he was convinced it was just a straw, because dad, at times would ask Kev to hand him a straw. Kev, being the completely and utterly deprived tard, handed our dad his dick. It's sad, and I really hate to discuss the deep dark secrets of the Borckway household, but my shrink seems to think that it is a form of therapy for me to get these things off my chest.

In closing, I would just to say that Kev craves two things: Music, and man ass.

Thundertard

I was listening to Led Zepplin this morning and paying tribute to the hammer of the gods when I had an epiphany. If Kev Brock dressed up as THOR, then he would become the amazing Thundertard and those willing to stand in his way would be smote by his golden metal master pedal of the gods. There was this one time, when we were kids, that Kev would put on a plaid blanket as a cape and got on the roof of the house. Then he would dive into a pile of leaves that dad raked up that morning. I couldn't tell him that there was a months worth of dog feces in it because our nextdoor neighbor had this great dane that they would feed t-bone steaks to. This dog would shit in our yard all the time and it always made dad furious, so he would rake it up into a big pile with all the leaves and leave it by the side of the house. Anyway, Kev would leap into this pile completely unaware and come out smelling like a compost heap at the San Diego Zoo. Poor guy. I didn't have the heart to tell him, so I would just stand there and point and stare and laugh. I think the best part of our childhood was going into that old abandoned house filled with asbestos and eating paint chips from the walls. That was always fun.

Kev made a funny post today. I am beginning to think he is really gay because he seems to have a fascination with certain people that he talks about all the time. What's really sad is that most of them are guys. I have to wonder about my brother Kev sometimes. It reminds me of another time when we were yonger when our mom used to spank us for being bad, but Kev would sit there with a big smile on his face as if begging for more. She would beat him so hard that I could have sworn that each time that happened, he was slowly stripped of his masculinity. After two years of spankings, he would gather outside with my cousin Adam and a few friends and have spanking contests. I never joined in because it looked a little awkward. Those were strange days.

I'm your biggest fan

I mean it from the bottom of my heart.

NOT.

For real, Kev should throw in towel asap. He's a talentless pathetic excuse for a musician. Hell, if you could even call him a musician without cringing, more power to you. His songs often make me wonder what this man really knows about music. He seems to think it tells a story. I think it sounds like a dr. seuss book. His next song is going to be called "I went to the store". I think it will go a little something like this.

I went to the store. Walked out the door.
My cousin Adam is a whore. I am such a bore.
I need more cash to go to the store
my job I hate wont pay me
anymore.
I'm gay like thor
My mom loves my online war
She thinks I am so hardcore.
What do I play guitar for?
I should quit so I don't play for those who ignore.
I'm poor and I wash dishes fool
If you don't like me you'll live a nightmare and that won't be cool
You tool. You think you can mess with the Brock?
All I like is to suck off cocks and say I'm the shit to my friends.
You're a douche who should make amends.
I couldn't come up with good words to this song.
So I will strum my guitar and furiously play with my dong.
It's wrong. I know it's tiny as shit, but with a virgin like me,
you take all the sex you can get. Even if it's all by myself.
I have dildos and lube and toys of all sorts on my shelf
And maybe I'll get a girlfriend. She'll look like my mother.
Rollover rover, I got a dick smaller than a 4-leaf clover.
And I have sexual thoughts about men.
I couldn't finish this song on my own, I wish the whole thing would end.

Kev Brock is Retarded.

This is Kev Brock, and he is a blithering babbling boring retard. I know he is a retard because he talks all retarded-like which signifies retardism. But he is not your average garden-variety retard. He is the godzilla of all retards. The king-kong sized fart of tardism. He has said on many occasions that he has golf-ball sized warts on his testicles. He swore that I should never tell anyone, but I couldn't help myself. This one time, he was giving his cousin Adam a blowjob in the back seat of Adams car, and his mom walked up and screamed at the top of her lungs "Hey Kevin, you fucking retard. Get some compound W and clear up those warts." But Kev never did that, and much like a retard, he spend the money his mother gave him for wart removal on a guitar. He has been trying to learn to play it ever since. I don't think he plays all that good, but people cheer him on because it's hard to tell a retard that they are a retard.

but I can.

Kev is retarded. I'm sorry he has been telling you all this time that he's not, because this one time he was masturbating with sandpaper and his brother was all like, "Hey Corky. Stop masturbating with sandpaper. Why do you have to be such a retard?"

I know all about it. I was there. It was funny. I laughed.

Kev Brock Is Gay. I have proof.

I know some of you read my blog. I don't give a flying two fucks. But I have proof Kev Brock is a flaming homosexual deviant who like to play with himself furiously. In his blog. he talked about playing a gig at a gay bar.

In one of his posts he writes, "I like those type of musicians that will do any show, any time and anywhere whether the show pays or not, like those musicains I've been sharing the stages lately, they will do any show, no matter. That's where I come from. I will play any show, anywhere, anyplace, and any time. I will even play a show at a gay bar if I had to.

Although I'm not straight, I'm 100% gay, I've been hearing that straight people do hang out at gay bars, plus I find gay people pretty cool to talk to as I'm starting to get gay guys adding me in myspace saying that they really dig my music. They seem really nice and down to earth, and they understand that you are straight. So gay people aren't dumb as most think they are."

I think Kev Brock has some serious issues. For one, he is almost 30 years old and to this point, not only does his mother still wipe his ass when he poops, but he has NEVER EVER been laid. (not including his left hand or latex pocket ass). He is a blatant waste of DNA and he could probably be the poster boy for reasons why you should take your birth control pills after anal sex. I know Kev will be reading this, because he can't seem to stay away from blogs that mention him and he brings up dirt about people that really don't don't give two shits if he lives or dies, but he will read this regardless, tell all his friends, and posse of Brock loving hillbillies will come out of the woodwork like the forrest scenes from deliverance.

But that's ok. I don't blame the hillbillies. God knows thats how Kev's conception really happened. We all know his parents are brother and sister. But what confuses me the most is how the canine semen was involved in said conception.

Did I mention Kev is a virgin. For those of you who have been fucking hot chicks so long that forgot what it was, this means Kev has NEVER EVER been laid. I think I mentioned this before, but I tend to ramble alot like members of the Brock clan.

Thanks to first amendment rights, not only can I remain completely anonymous, but I am also covered by the same governing rules that Kev himself like to hide behind. Eat me.

Love,

Your #1 Fan